12/28/99
Softball: A Brazen Gamble on the Glories of Normalcy
Dear People,
As you know, there was no game last week due to a rather unsettling lack of aerobic fervor within the ranks. I would like to think that this was some kind of freako holiday anomaly, and not a harbinger of creeping millennial slothiositude. Regardless, I will stay vigilant.
In any case, and as a few of you may realize, this Saturday, January 1st, is the very first day in the history of the world in which the honored and sagacious custom of abbreviating four digit years with two digits notations may cause some of our favorite machines to start acting both churlish and frisky. Maybe. Maybe not. I don’t know. But I do know that in times of stress and uncertainty, softball playing tribes throughout history have always been able to gather around the lush organic grasses of the playing field, united in the knowledge that their game does not stand or fall on the attainment of "mission critical compliance." No, we need only bat, ball, mitt and groining cup, and in point of fact, we have no use for the Os and 1s of the technology-using peoples. That’s not a boast; it’s just honest analysis.
Therefore, there will be a game at Codornices this Saturday, January 1st, at 1PM, IF I get enough players by this THURSDAY at noon (Once again, Parks and Rec is closed on Friday). I understand that it takes a lot of courage to commit to this particular day, but I would gently remind you that 30 years from now, when your obnoxious little grandchildren are asking what you did to celebrate the first day of the century, it probably wouldn’t be too inspiring if you had to say "Gosh, Zeke, I was invited to a great game of softball at gorgeous Codornices Park, but I was quite worried that my spreadsheet would fuck up, so I stayed home all day and hid out in the ‘ol bomb shelter." Yeah, that would sound really good.
I think you see my point, and I think you understand that it’s time to make that commit. If nothing else, do it as a clarion message to the nation which says you will no longer be intimidated by The Man, for the abstract risk of calamity is the galvanizing juice upon which a passion for softball flourishes anew….Raymond
12/30/99
Softball: A Brief and Slightly Less-Than-Gentle Approach
Dear People,
It is Thursday morning and we are still SEVERAL players short of a minimum quorum. I don’t have time to grovel, but please be aware that I am a reasonable tyrant, and will not insist that you show up if your stupid overrated little infrastructure is truly in the process of imploding come this Saturday morning. Now stop being so shamelessly craven and make that commit.
Update late this afternoon….Raymond
12/30/99
Softball: The Swirling Cauldron of Richly Textured Uncertainty
Dear People,
As you know, my spleen drips with the venom of 1,000 pissed off Mojave rattlers forced from their homes by yet another Vegas suburban housing tract whenever I have to cancel a game, so in deference to the true and dedicated, I am not going to do that. However please be aware that as of this writing, we are only at 13 commits, and thus I would much appreciate any others who would like to join the festivities (or more likely, if there are any prior commits who can round up an embittered ex-lover or two). Remember, when you make me beg by phone for players on the last day of the millennium, it’s the entire softball community that suffers the taint of disgrace for generations to come. That’s not a gripe, that’s just a fact.
In any case, barring imminent signs of socioeconomic chaos, there will be a game this Saturday at Codornices at 1PM. Please bring $2 and a can of pinto beans…Raymond 845-7552
PS: I’ll have a football, just in case.
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