Softball: The Random Boot of Municipal Tyranny
Dear People,
On an icy but gorgeous made-for-softball day, Chris Fure's team utterly pulverized my own, 21-11. And yet, the score hardly tells the story, for the hard truth is that it was only as close as it was because we played under the humiliating protection of the Community Mercy Rule for nearly half the game! As you may know, the CMR kicks in at the beginning of any half inning in which one side has a 10-run advantage, by limiting the dominant contingent to just two outs while giving the floundering side four. Ironically, though, a recent study in the Clemson Review of Recreational Angst suggests that its net effect is marginal, since whatever strategic lift is given to the trailing team is likely offset by “the gnawing psychic wound of being coddled like athletically challenged morons.”
Now look, as captain, I'm well aware that Frank's base-running was treasonously under-fueled and that Ramona's curious confusions at second transformed certain double plays into unsightly 2-run errors. For that matter, I don't deny that as we began to crater, Anthony mastered the somewhat disturbing metaphor of outfielder as sieve. Nevertheless, I was their captain and they were my peeps, and while I obviously can't be held responsible for the calamity that befell us, I simply will not cast aspersions on those that I cherish (Of course to the extent that “blame” for any one blow-out can be de-abstracted, understood or even ascribed at all, I think we all know that Frank, Ramona and Anthony must bear the taint of history's aerobic scorn).
In any case, I think you need to know that just a few hours ago I cheerily traipsed into the Berkeley City Department of Parks and Recreation to pick up our reservation slips, when I was suddenly told, without warning, that the Berkeley-Albany Girl's Softball League had “taken” Codornices this upcoming Sunday. Needless to say, I was tempted to ask the various functionaries at said department how they would feel if I were to “take” their own homeland, or their dignity, or perhaps just their virginity, but being seasoned in the diplomatic arts, I merely noted that I could think of no cuter a group of presumptuous pre-pubescent terrorists to occupy our field. And therefore there will be a game at GROVE PARK this Sunday at 11, IF I get enough commits by this Friday morning…Raymond
PS: For those who are relatively new to the community, Grove is actually an excellent space and our preferred back-up whenever the BAGSL or those of their ilk try to destroy our communal cohesion. It's located at Oregon and MLK (one block North of Ashby; See http://www.ci.berkeley.ca.us/ContentDisplay.aspx?id=12580).
PPS: I'll be out of town thru Saturday night, so my commit confirmations may be a little slower than usual. Stay calm.
12/5/10
Softball: Sunday 9:15AM: Grove at 11/Assumption of Risk/Courage!
Dear People,
Here's the sitch (as I used to say in my youth): Grove Park is officially closed, and there are several signs on the surrounding fences saying as much. However, the field has no puddles and though it's still wet in the outfield, it's very playable, and moreover, it's now sunny and gorgeous.
The thing is (as I used to say in my youth), this is Grove and not Codornices, so I'm not sure what the risks are of being kicked off the field. Obviously, it's a more exposed locale. Yeah, I'm trembling from abulia and my eyes are moist with emotion.
Thankfully, though, Chris Fure has told me we have no choice and agreed to take complete blame if this all turns out badly. Therefore, I'll see you at GROVE at 11!...Raymond
PS: I need one more player to make 20! Seize the day, embrace the risk and tell me you're playing! In fact, there are three slots still open, and nothing says “unmovable aerobic force” like 22 players.
PPS: If we get booted, there are back up options.
PPPS: Grove is at Russell and MLK. If you go to Codornices because you're not paying attention, you will see a bunch of pre-teen girl land thieves playing on our field in peace because it is not closed. Grrrrrr….