Softball: The Ceaseless Allure of Resistance to Authority
Dear People,
My team punished Chris Fure's, 13-11, in a compelling aerobic masterwork that revealed the dark and disturbing underbelly of the inscrutable human soul. I specifically refer you to the targeting of Jim “post-blade” McGuire, whose raw determination to play just six short weeks after undergoing shoulder surgery is a truly wondrous if somewhat ill-advised case of athletic intrepidity. The fact is that Jimmy's left arm is still a pendulous paragon of uselessness, and yet for the record, he did bat honorably with his good right arm, he ran with admirable resolve, and while he had to play with a left-handed glove, his fielding was as rock solid as if he had been a lefty all along! In theory.
In reality, of course, the Jimster struggled mightily as a metaphorical cabal of rapacious power-hitting bioprof-dissing tiger sharks zeroed in on our little gimpy guppy as if he were oozing the sweetest piscine blood in all the open seas. Over the first several innings, Donny, Dan, Frank and the Furinator unleashed taunting blasts to right, where our hero's bum rotator cuff had apparently triggered an unexpected collapse in the visual acuity of his tragically overloaded eyeballs. And thus, as the 7th finally came to a close, we were still clinging to a narrow 11-11 lead, but they had big mo on a four-run rally and were clearly planning to pound Jim anew. I looked out to right as he walked dejectedly back to the bleachers, and truth be told, my bosom quivered and my eyes suddenly grew moist as I viewed the theoretical son that I had never had. Yet I also considered nano-drone-darts as a way to discretely euthanize him.
Fortunately, Blade-boy himself took charge when big Joe P let loose with a frightful two-on-two-out 8th-inning bullet down the right field line. This time, however, Professor McGuire dug deep into his inner pre-surgical childhood dexterity, and in snagging that ball clean (with a left-handed glove!), he not only crushed their cynical blitzkrieg right then and there, but he gave us the galvanizing mojo to go on and kick some well justified ass. Moreover, and perhaps most importantly, he's now the triumphant new symbol of hope for all of us who've ever wanted to look into the eyes of a stern and brooding surgeon who's just told us that we'll be on the DL for at least six months, and gently respond “Sure, whatever…” And therefore there will be a game at Grove Park this Sunday at 11, IF I get enough commits by this Friday morning . . . Raymond
10/25/13
Softball: A Classic Berkeley Red
Dear People,
There will be a game at Grove Park this Sunday at 11, and as of now there are still six slots left.
Please bring $4 for the field, which for this week only includes a delightful past-match stein of 1999 Châteauneuf-du-Pape, Vieux Telegraphe (please allow 10 minutes for chilling)…Raymond 845-7552