9/15/10

9/15/10

Softball: Drivel within a Comparative Context

Dear People,

In one of those transcendent displays of aerobic excellence that falls somewhere between the rekindlage of sheer communal joy and the irrefutable proof of a random-ass God, Chris Fure’s team crushed my own on the last hit of the game, 11-10. The brutal denouement arrived in the bottom of the 9th with the score tied, two on, two out and my nervous little innards so twisted into knots that it’s as if they were a gastrointestinal metaphor for the outer ergosphere of an insatiable black hole. In any case, the normally dazzling Tom Bilyard initially looked frightened and callow as he came to the plate, but he quickly drilled an Alan Brill butter ball straight up the middle, and with that, he not only brought the match to a breath-taking close, but he showed once again that when Anne is sitting right there in the bleachers, he will never miss a chance to validate her recent leap of insane nuptial faith (see http://www.eslnotes.com/ray/122309.html ).

Sure enough, a few seconds later I looked over at Anne, and I could see that her eyes were moistened by a wave of deep spousal pride. “My God, he’s British, he a post-doc and he’s all mine” she sheepishly whispered, adding “and then when I see him smash balls like that, I feel like the luckiest woman on the face of the earth.” I smiled gently, but it was a bittersweet gesture, for I also knew that while Wendy can take a certain comfort in knowing that one day I’ll most certainly be both a post-doc in medieval geonuclear semantics and a subject of her majesty’s awesome realm, the hard truth is that I’ll likely never hit in the clutch with such inspirational clarity of purpose. Yeah, still acrid is the failure that is both discrete and contained, and therefore there will be a game at Codornices this Sunday at 11, IF I get enough commits by this Friday morning…Raymond

9/16/10

Softball: The Cat Tongues of Chez Pretentious

Dear People,

There will be a game at Codornices this Sunday at 11, and as of now it is full. As always, please let me know ASAP if you committed and need to cancel, and feel free to get on a wait list or contact me later for reopened slots.

Also: There are vicious rumors of possible rain that morning, but my sources at the Latvian Consulate in Livermore assure me that this simply will not happen. Nevertheless, if climatological conditions are ambiguous, assume nothing and check email around 10AM. Remember, we are a stout people by both birth and temperament and we do not easily cave (except when a plurality start to gripe about it being all wetty-pooh outside).

This week’s field fee is just $4, and that includes a delightful post-game peach sherbet with raspberries, myrrh and langues de chat…Raymond 845-7552

PS: Paul H left his beloved green stainless steel water bottle at the game last week. If anybody took it for safekeeping, please let me know.

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