9/10/15
Softball: Bits and Pieces
Dear People,
On a broiling East Bay day that made me tremble for the future of my desiccated uvula, Anthony's team gingerly anesthetized my own, 14-8. Starting mid-game, I noticed that the Antman led his posse with the rigor of a finely tuned Machina d'intimidation, and I don't say that just because I like to blend my widely varied romance tongues. The fact is that in the 4th, Jerry walked in a run on a bases-loaded grease-ball to Frank “I'll-swing-at-anything” Cheung, and in the 7th, with two outs and bases loaded, the great Jim McGuire popped up to short, and then, in the 9th, as Rachel's own blooper to 1st fell straight toward Lora's glove, 45 years of intuitive softball sagacity instantly combusted as I inexplicably took off for 2nd, exactly 1.3 seconds before the inevitable catch. Now, one could argue that this once again shows the disconcerting correlation between the frequency of double-plays and the cognitive corrosion of base-runners over 50, yet perhaps it's just me, kinesiological spaz that I am.
The point is that while I may be a moron in the classical sense, I did in fact take a beginning course in BASIC at Santa Monica Community College in 1978, and as my grandmama used to say, thanks God for that. That's because as a result of my digital seasoning, I can tell that softball-hating elements at the mysterious Gmail Corporation continue to toy with the underlying aerobic cohesion of our communal whole, still randomly stripping away about 12% of the 461 addresses in my formally trouble-free 'softball group' (I happen to know that a few of the tossed addresses belong to some of our most cherished members, including Jerry, Mel and that darling Kentucky county clerk whose fight for the fundamental right to be a state-employed nutjob undoubtedly inspires us all, although to be honest, I don't think she's ever shown up for a game. Frankly, thanks God for that).
In any case, as one who has programming deep in my tech-timid bosom, I was able to find, and apparently learn to implement, a somewhat befuddling 6-step workaround for the dumbass bug in question. Of course I won't know if it actually works until I send out this very drivel, but every fiber of my being says that if we can successfully stick together against, among other things, the City, the weather, the stupid Hayward Fault and the inherent exasperation of just dealing with the human species, then we can certainly triumph over the appalling failures of software. And therefore there will be a game at Codornices this Sunday at 11, IF we get enough commits by this Friday morning . . . Raymond
PS: I would paste in the Gmail help page that shows the frenzied discussion of this nefarious bug, but in a bit of technological meta-irony, the page, which pops up perfectly from my Bookmarks list, dissolves into an “error 404” message when the URL is sent out through cyberspace. Needless to say, someone needs to be detained and charged.
PPS: My Generation:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1tqxzWdKKu8
9/11/15
Softball: Bones of Yore
Dear People,
There will be a game at Codornices this Sunday at 11, and as of now there are still five slots left.
Please bring $4 for the field, which will feature a spontaneously organized post-match briefing on last month's discovery of the new Homo Naledi Hominin in South Africa*, including why I personally believe that just because the Naledinian people had brains the size of lemons and scurried about aimlessly over 1,800,000 years ago, they may have very well been the first practitioners of a primitive but joyous post-Lucy rockball . . . Raymond 845-7552
* http://www.nytimes.com/2015/09/11/science/south-africa-fossils-new-species-human-ancestor-homo-naledi.html
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