8/1/12
Softball: Strivings in Reportorial Integrity
Dear People,
After an initial five-inning pitcher's dual that had Chris Fure's team nursing a fragile 2-2 lead, my side exploded as if it were a cosmic singularity in the throes of a universal aerobic birth, and thus when it was all over, we had devoured our opponents whole, 18-9. Mateo unleashed our 6th-inning onslaught with a blistering 3-RBI homer to the croc-infested bush beyond deep center right, and just two hits later, Anthony answered that blast with his own stern statement to left-a full 10 runner-advancing inches down the 3rd base line! Yeah, I mention this because I happen to believe that the synergistic imperative requires nothing less than a shamelessly vast range of firepower, and if that makes you feel coarsened, tawdry or even oleaginous, then so be it.
The point is that I have to call it as I see it, with neither fear nor favor nor the tempting overreach of literary license. Perhaps that goes without saying, and yet here I am, still in a bit of a shock after learning that one of my favorite young writers has been caught making up quotes out of pure imaginary cloth, and even worse, attributing them to one of my favorite not-so-young musicians! See here for the scandalous lowdown:
http://mediadecoder.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/07/30/jonah-lehrer-resigns-from-new-yorker-after-making-up-dylan-quotes-for-his-book/
Revelations like this sour me on the entire world of journalism, and yet I have a job to do. So let me just conclude by reporting that we as a community discussed the disconcerting rate of injury among our cherished pitchers, and what we could do to minimize their risk without having to switch from softball to curling, horse dressage or nude croquet. After much soul searching, we concluded that at least for the time being, composite bats would be banned, and if any pitcher wanted to strictly enforce the Berkeley city league rules, they could also ban double-wall bats for that particular game (women, though, can continue to use any damn bats they please). There was also a hesitant consensus that neither the mushy fast-pitch balls nor protective pitcher's screens were necessary, for in the end, we're basically a bold and intrepid folk who simply refuse to look like a bunch of lily-livered recreants.
Indeed, as we wrapped up the pre-match discussion, one of our non-hurling superstars dryly noted that the pitchers were drawn to their station by the opportunity for greater remuneration, the glory of the limelight and the inexplicable thrill of peril itself. “Look,” Paul Fine whispered in my ear (or perhaps it was Paul Horsepool, or for that matter Stephanie or Kora), “these guys are transcendent beyond bone and cartilage, like well-stocked replacement parts.” To be sure, Dylan himself once said that to live outside the law you must be honest, and I'm not sure I got that either. Yet here we all are, 47 years later and thick in the conundrum of yet another of life's great ethical trade-offs, and while we may not get it totally right, I'd like to think that if another one of our greats is felled at the mound, they'll instantly feel the inertial love of our sincerest communal abulia. And therefore there will be a game at Codornices this Sunday at 11, IF I get enough commits by this Friday morning…Ray
PS: I'll soon be in world-beloved Los Angeles, so don't be alarmed if it takes me a bit longer than usual to confirm your commits.
PPS: A couple hours ago I was watching our fab five American girls compete on the uneven bars in London, and honestly, I've rarely been so athletically inspired. Still, I'm a bit hesitant to make a definitive announcements at this point, since I just don't know if I'm limber enough to train for Rio. Yeah, I have all the heart in the world, but if you must know, I worry about my gender, my age, and in all candor, dislocating my face.
8/3/12
Softball: Roots
Dear People,
Greetings from Los Angeles, my cherished childhood home and America's most deeply loved metropolis, or as I like to say, God's Country.
There will be a game at Codornices this Sunday at 11, and as of now, there is still one slot left. One!
Please bring $4 for the field, which for this week only includes a special pre-game symposium on the daring cuisine of Northern Encino....Raymond 845-7552
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