Softball: A Tactical Sabbatical
Dear People,
My team stunned Chris Fure’s 23-20, after rallying from an 8th inning 20-10 deficit that initially appeared so overwhelming that I was just about to request immediate resignations from every one of my players. In retrospect, we merely needed a little more time to find our esprit de mojo, which is not so surprising given that nearly a third of my folk were newbies or even semi-coerced last-second invites, and as such, understandably frightened by the curious and exotic behaviors that we somehow pretend is within the basic spectrum of recreational normalcy. In reality, of course, the local yak and other wildlife must view us as we really are—a stick-wielding orb-obsessed anthropological paragon of pure group-psychosis.
In any case, I will soon be leaving for a strange and exotic land, far, far away (Portland, Oregon), and thus I will be unable to organize the kinesiological release that so many of you crave. Even worse, the number of our core players who remain injured or out of town is still disturbingly high, while many of the new recruits that I’ve added over the last few weeks have apparently fled forever, perhaps justifiably freaked by the very nature of who we are and what we do (which is not to say that they aren’t as cherished as every other person on this list).
The point is that my eyes fill with the tears of 1,000 orphaned seal-pups whenever my gut tells me it’s not worth trying to organize a game, but this is one of those extremely rare weeks. So stay calm and patient, consider jogging, darts or nude bowling, and know that if all goes as planned, I will be writing you from my sister’s Seattle dungeon in just one week, letting you know that there will be game the following Sunday and that all is well with the world. Courage…Raymond
PS: A last-minute missive from two community stalwarts: Chris and Matt have informed me that they will be out at Codornices at the regular time to do a little batting practice and perhaps try for a game of ultimate frisbee. The field is not reserved, but I suspect it won’t be taken and whoever joins them will be able to frolic freely (Experience shows that vacuums in recreational real estate take a few weeks before they start to fill). So try to show up and be one with Chris and Matt, because in all candor, I think it beats nude bowling.