7/8/09

Softball: Alaska (The Divergent Means of Advancing Toward Home)

Dear People,

Chris Fure’s team destroyed my own, 29-15, in one of those long and arduous ordeals in which the more nobly we played, the further we fell behind. I think of that curious pas de duex in the 6th when Chris himself barreled through me as I desperately tried to grab a sharp line drive to right, for it was exactly then and there that my left leg suddenly wrapped tightly around his lower spleen and torso in a truly remarkable moment of sensual aerobic twister. Our baseline collision was inadvertent and innocent, of course, but ultimately it was only I who suffered Newtonian shock and a broken watch while the Furinator scampered quickly on to second—undaunted, focused and giggly.

For what it’s worth, our greatly varied patterns of physical movement came into uniquely sharp relief throughout this particular game. Pace and Don Loeb continue to set the bar with cheetah-like speed and turnage, whereas Deborah Seskin, Steve’s beloved sister, made her league debut with a somewhat more restrained approach that clearly showed base running is a genetic marker of uncanny familial precision.

I thought this was a fabulous discovery, but when I excitedly told Deborah that she ran exactly like her brother, she actually seemed distressed by the news. I, of course, would not indulge her despair, for I happen to know that over the years, our community’s most cherished moral backbones—Steve himself and Nanci—have always waddled with unabashed pride rather than merely run. And therefore there will be a game at Codornices this Sunday at 11, IF I get enough commits by this Friday morning. . .Ray

PS: The hard truth is that not only did I fail as a coach, but by misjudging the overall speed of the two teams, I may have caused a wipeout for the game as a whole. Needless to say, there are those amongst our people who are grumbling, the national press is now hard on my ass, and above and beyond all that, I fully concede that I’m simply not wired to operate as usual under the old organizational aerobics. Indeed, I think we all know that it’s time for me to call an audible, pass the ball and finally retire to my beloved childhood dacha in suburban Fairbanks. Nevertheless, I won’t do that, if for no other reason than doing so would make me look like a total blithering loon.


7/10/09

Softball: Choices

Dear People,

There will be a game at Codornices this Sunday at 11, and as of now there are still four slots left.

Please bring $4 for the field, which for this week only includes either a delightful Wolfe Ranch quail grilled over vine cuttings with fennel sauce and wild chanterelle mushrooms or a complimentary post-game root canal with soothing oral sedation…Ray 845-7552

BACK