Softball: Forward, quickly ever Forward

Dear People,

My team held off Chris Fure’s 12-10, in large part because of a fateful final-inning incident of hope-draining miscommunication. As far as I could tell, here’s what happened: Desperate and down by two with one out in the bottom of the 9th, Chris’ contingent was itching to pounce when Darryl led things off with a stunning blast to the bushy tundra beyond deep center right. Instantly, the Darrylator took off like a crazed gazelle on crack, and was already rounding 2nd when Siram finally found the ball hiding under a big ’ol desiccated yak dropping. Amazingly though, the hard throw to short was flawless, and what had initially appeared like a certain home run was quickly transformed into an honorable but limited zeitgeist-shifting triple.

Curiously, Darryl himself didn’t seem to “understand” the rapidly evolving situation on the ground, and thus as he dashed toward 3rd without the slightest hint that he was actually going to stop, a chorus of panicked shouts suddenly rang out from the bleachers. In theory, Chris, Craig and Ken were frantically screaming for Darryl to “HOLD!,” although Darryl swears that all he heard was “HOME!” In fact, I was right there and I can tell you that the dominant shout was actually “HOE!,” which in all candor, I found lurid, unnecessary and as a missive of tactical advice, ambiguous at best.

The point is that Darryl was utterly determined to beat the throw as he rounded 3rd and darted for the plate, and indeed he would’ve done so easily—had he gotten there about five seconds earlier. No, my friends, I won’t fault him or his tiny little ears, any more than I’d fault Hilary today or that Swiss Marathon runner in the ’84 LA Olympics or even Magellan in 1519, as he defied the naysayers and circled the globe while fearlessly facing down scurvy, local pirates and Portuguese-hating rhinoceri. Indeed, they all make me realize how much I admire the sheer perseverance of those amongst us who hear the piercing cacophony of unintelligible phonetic slurage, and yet decide to dart straight into the meat grinder anyway. And therefore there will be a game at Codornices this Sunday at 11AM, IF I get enough commits by this Friday morning…Ray


5/23/08

Softball: Yummy

Dear People,

There will be a game at Codornices this Sunday at 11AM, and as of now, there are still six slots left. You are therefore once again welcome to commit any non-community people you know, so long as they promise to keep their felonious behaviors to a minimum.

This week’s field fee is just $3, and that includes a fresh post-game buffet of assorted cold cuts, pickles and non-steroidal pain killers…Ray 845-7552
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