5/8/02

Softball: A Desperate Appeal of Woe and Hope

Dear People,

Congratz to all on last week’s scintillating 19-15 session of finely crafted kinesiologic magnificence, replete as it was with the fresh cherubic faces of several non-communal conscripts. The cloudless East Bay skies and the continually changing lead only added to the majesty of my own team’s final triumph, and truth be told, I’m always quite satisfied whenever the final score is eerily aligned with the compelling dates of World War I. Call me a fruitloop, but I happen to think history matters, and for that I don’t apologize.

In any case, rather than torment you with another missive of dubious import, I must shift tone and solemnly ask all of those who played a week and half ago to please check and see if you accidentally took my beloved mitt of 10 years standing. It was missing from the equipment container at the last game, and while Jay was kind enough to loan me his, the feel of another person’s leather on my metacarpic skinnage made me feel sullen, vulnerable and curiously lascivious.

I’d be lying if I told you this is the most gorgeous glove you’ve ever seen. In fact, it’s so non-descript that I don’t even remember the manufacturer or if it’s signed or whatever, but I can say that it’s generic orange, in good shape, and LEFT-HANDED. It’s also of tremendous sentimental value, if for no other reason than I was wearing it for every one of the 3,894 errors that I’ve committed since the ’92 primaries. So please, check in your cars, closets and refrigerators and help me find my cherished Boobala, lest I be forever deprived of the one true source of love that I’ve ever really known. And yes, because I am convinced deep in my innards that someone will soon rescue her, there will be a game at Codornices this Sunday at 11AM, IF I get enough commits by this Friday morning….Raymond



Softball: The Necessity of Seduction

Dear People,

There will be a game at Codornices this Sunday at 11AM, and as of now, there are still SIX slots left (Therefore, anybody reading this is once again welcome to commit their non-community friends, lovers, and psychotic extended-family embarrassments, so long as they actually show up).

Please bring $2 for the field, which for this week only, includes both a pre-game lube and oil, AND a complimentary fortnight of fresh whole term life insurance…..Raymond 845-7552

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