Softball: Another Abstract Peril
Dear People,
Pace's team floundered about like a drunken shovel-nosed sturgeon stuck on the deck of an industrial trolley boat, and when it was all over, my side had deboned that fish, and deboned it hard, 21-15. Before the game even started, Tony Mac had hurled a searing ground ball to his beloved Mary, who promptly suffered a painful yet curiously Rothkoesque tibial shiner, and then Jim McGuire congealed their ominous trajectory by casually strolling into the most unsightly 1st-inning post-double pick-off that I've ever witnessed. Sad.
In the explosive 5th, my team took full, irreversible and mercy-rule triggering control with a six-run rally capped by Alan Shabel's stealing of home; That he did so as the Pacemesiter's ball-holding infield bickered amongst themselves only added to the ghastly aesthetics of their ongoing multi-error collapse. Still, and in fairness, they later fought back with a certain varnished dignity that cut our lead in half, and while they eventually came up short, I think they might have just pulled it off had we not, in all candor, deboned them so hard.
The point is that I happen to be reading about various dumbass threats to humanity this morning when I came across a reference to the 1,000-yard wide asteroid, 1950DA, which, truth be told, I had never heard of until now. Well, I'm obviously a bit chagrined by the gaps in my basic knowledge of apocalyptic risks to everything I know and cherish, but there it is. . .
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1950_DA
Now look, I'm not bringing this up just to frighten you, but as a softball-playing guy with an incalculable stake in the distant recreational future, I don't think it's ethical to simply ignore the risks to our aerobic-craving progeny. The hard truth is that scientists now believe that there is a 1 in 300 chance that on March 16, 2880, this despicable civilization-taunting rock-thing will smash into the Atlantic Ocean, thereby leaving our entire planet utterly uncomfortable for our pitifully fragile species.
So sure, I can sit here and pretend it's not happening and make disparaging little remarks about shovel-nosed sturgeons (most of whom are a lot cuter than you'd think and would undoubtedly survive regardless). Yet on this magical Ash Wednesday-my favorite of the vital lent-based holidays-I'd like to believe that I'm better than that, and indeed, if devoting my life to mastering the mechanics of asteroidal deflection is what it will take to eliminate this menace, then that's what I plan to do. And therefore there will be a game at Codornices this Sunday at 11, IF I get enough commits by this Friday morning…Raymond
2/24/12
Softball: Whip Smart
Dear People,
There will be a game at Codonrices this Sunday at 11, and as of now there are four slots left.
Please bring $4 for the field, which for this week only includes a certified honorary doctorate from Oxford in quantum electrodynamics…Raymond 845-7552