2/14/07
SOFTBALL: Notice: New Email Address during a time of Crisis!!!
Dear People,
For reasons I don’t profess to understand, the playful and frisky folks at Gmail suddenly disabled my raymondweschler@gmail.com account about an hour ago. I have very diplomatically written them an email expressing a patina of frustration on my part, but given that there are probably around 4 trillion gmail accounts, I’m not particularly hopeful. In any case, if anybody knows someone who works at Google, could you please ask them to stop hosing me, and by derivation, the entire softball community.
In the meantime, there is no reason to panic, since with the help of some mysterious technological acumen that I didn’t even know I possessed, I have quickly set up this new account, and somehow transferred the entire softball list from my sister’s computer in Seattle to my beloved Mac here in Berkeley. I am guardedly optimistic.
Softball letter to come/Respond to this address/Courage….Ray
2/14/07
Softball: Our Sublime Media Culture (The Nature of Bandwagons, Part 2)
Dear People,
My deepest sympathies to all for the recent denial of the one aerobic event that gives significance and hope to your otherwise meaningless, sedentary lives. For the record, I seriously considered telling you to come out and play with shovels and buckets, but after gingerly traipsing through the endless quicksand-like muds of deep centerfield, I concluded that there was simply too great a risk that one or more of our outfielders would be swallowed alive by the earth itself. Throw in the added dangers of sprained ankles, Chlamydia and rickets, and I hope you can see why I did what I done.
In any case, and as long as I’m on the defensive, I think I need to preemptively confess to something that’s admittedly somewhat embarrassing, but also very important; Yes, back in January of 2006, when I told you all that I was enslaved in my sister’s dark and dank Seattle dungeon, that wasn’t entirely true. In fact, that week I wasn’t really in Seattle at all, but rather in LA. Or Houston. Or maybe the Bahamas—I don’t really remember.
The point is that I, too, will soon enter Federal District Court in order to file both an emergency custody order and a DNA-backed paternity suit, for it is the only way I know to guarantee my solemn parental rights to Dannielynn-Hope-Marshall-Stern-Smith-Weschler, that utterly precious cooing baby I sired with Anna Nicole Smith. And yeah, I know she’s mine with every fiber of my being. Please don’t tell Wendy.
Oh sure, I’m not a high-powered attorney with a really unfortunate name or some God-like 20-something boy-toy or a self-proclaimed nutso Bavarian Prince (Though for what it’s worth, those guys are just a bunch of hoes, anyway). No, I’m just me, a simple local lad who happens to run an unaffiliated email-organized softball league. But I can tell you right now that none of this matters, for I plan to speak genetic truth to power, and when it’s all over, Dannielynn will be home where she belongs, and if she happens to later come with the contested $600,000,000 estate of a long-dead Texan oilman, then that’s just incidental frosting on the moist chocolate tryst cake of brief forbidden love. And therefore there will be a game at Codornices this Sunday at 11AM, IF I get enough commits by this Friday morning…Raymond
2/15/07
Softball: Threats Implicit
Dear People,
First things first: After vigorous appeals, Gmail agreed to reactivate my original account. I think the missive that persuaded them was my third, which ended with the following; “This is so totally bogus; Do you really want every softball-loving person in America switching to Yahoo?!” God, I love the power of the pen.
In any case, there will be a game at Codornices this Sunday at 11AM, and as of now, there’s still one slot left (!) As always, please let me know ASAP if you need to cancel.
This weeks field fee is just $3, and that includes a delightful trout consommé with monkfish liver and fresh Cuban seaweed …Raymond 845-7552
BACK